Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize