i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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