So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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