then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
