Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
what day is it and did you see me today?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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