She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
