you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
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If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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