Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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