FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
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He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
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Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
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