Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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