I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
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I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
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did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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