I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize