I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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