I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
