She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
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