Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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