he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
