Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
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I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
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this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world