Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
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while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
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I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
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