I feel like I'm in dance class right now
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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