No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
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I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
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It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
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