What a fucking waste of an outfit
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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