youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
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They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
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Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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