did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Two words: nipple clamps
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