I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Why are your pants in the freezer?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
