turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
this just has baby written all over it
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
