Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Go christen that room with your naked body.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
