You're my little dorito
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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