WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
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