windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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