I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize