I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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