We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
nutella sex= disaster
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
