If i come over, it means nothing
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
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remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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