I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
