It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
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Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
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Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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