I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I just had sex on a roof
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
