Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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