Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
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