Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize