just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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