11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Randomize
