it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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