Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
