please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
