Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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