Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
