she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
