Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize