do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Randomize
