i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize